RANDOM AND NOT EDITED

 

Whether I say something encouraging here

Or nothing at all seem consequential

The fact remains: Our world is broken and so are we

Mostly our decisions are small and forgettable

I know the sort of persons I don’t like to be around

Cynical, demanding, moody, unkind...

But mostly, my chances often tip me to the direction of these personalities

Yet I collect my thoughts and lay them mentally in front of me

I sift through my feelings and intentions with equal respect

Acknowledging frankly the frustrations alongside the love

Now, relating this to the fate and plights of women

My pen has this to say

“Too many women become desperate

They hunger for love, attention and affection

So they settle for less

Settling with guys who doesn’t know the first thing about how to treat a woman

This is just because they are impatient

They don’t trust God’s romantic plans for them

So they compromise

And give themselves out to men who are not worth a second glance

And on a beautiful morning

The sun while lose its smile

The bright blue sky will turn gray

And they will get a message like this

…“I think we should break up”

And they will trouble their minds with these thoughts”

This doesn’t make any sense

Hadn’t he said he will always love me?

Hadn’t he repeated time without number that he can’t live without me?

Doesn’t he appreciate I have built my entire world around him all these while?

A cutting pain squeeze my heart

This is so intense I can scarcely breathe

The nightmare has come true again

Once again, I am in for a sleepless night of agony

Hours of weeping until no more tears would come

I have given a piece of me away in every single relationship

Piece of my heart, emotion and even my body

Yet each time they get bored, they toss my fragile heart away

I longed to be loved and cherished

I have dreamt of a perfect love ever since I knew about Romeo and Juliet

But my dreams have shattered along with the broken and fragmented pieces of my heart

I don’t see anything wrong with the way I chose to live

My lifestyle is far more moral than most of my peers’”….

But those are nothing but laments

It is obviously late to think now

She can only resolve to make a better decision next time

But my pen while continue from her

“Most of us have fallen flat on our faces when it comes to romance

Nearly all of us are familiar with the fragrance

The awful fragrance that accompanies a decomposing relationship

I’m sorry to some partners of a relationship

I wish I even had the opportunity to mess a relationship up

I know the world you live in, because I live in it too

Nobody can accuse me of not knowing what it feels like to be ugly

I also know what it feels to be lonely

I know what it feels like to desire someone

Someone whom you can share a passionate love and intimate embrace

But growing up in the church, I came to believe that everything I longed for was bad

Bad for my proper spiritual development

The “thou shall nots”

For many years I struggle to find the right words to capture my agonizing frustration

I was a young boy fighting a constant inward battle

Between needing to obey God’s “thou shall nots”

And longing to fulfill my passionate sensual desires

No red blooded human can resist this

But why does it seem that everything I desire most in this life leads to my destruction

Why must I be restrained from something so beautiful?

As much as I want to taste all the pleasures of the world

I don’t relish the idea of going to hell

Can I say my greatest fear of God is motivated by my fear of hell?

A deep conviction penetrates my heart

But I can’t argue with the rules God gave

Because I noticed that God never loses a debate

With every step closer to the edge of this cliff

I have lost something precious

I’m just going to trust that God knows what he is doing

I won’t be a fool giving what I cannot keep to gain what I cannot lose”