THE SURVIVING CONQUEROR

I am a usual conqueror

But sometimes I’m just a survivor

I have developed confidence in my ability to survive

But then I am forgetting my ability to conquer

Perhaps there may be more to this

My fear of losing survival in the quest to conquer persists

They are immune to my efforts to overcome them

But they cost me so much of my abilities

My typical first responses is always the thought of death and self-destruction

But it doesn’t have to be this way

As devastating as this situation could be

It doesn’t have the power to defeat me

For a while I may not even realize that I’m surviving

It may not feel like surviving

At some point I realize that I have been surviving

But it is too early to comfortably call myself just a survivor

I need to conquer